I received disappointing new yesterday. Because of what is going on between my husband and I, with court, custody and eventually divorce, and an accusation that was made that is completely false, I've been told to take time off from doing any church ministry. The exact words were to "lay low". It is really difficult because church is my life. I feel like I am being punished for standing up for myself and getting out of an abusive situation. I feel like I have so much to grieve.
That is where I am at. I am trying to process and figure out what life will be like without it being surrounded by church ministries.
I feel like the black sheep, out of the circle, and completely alone.
That is where I am at. I am trying to process and figure out what life will be like without it being surrounded by church ministries.
I feel like the black sheep, out of the circle, and completely alone.
That must feel so horrible and strange. (Although I can't relate personally as I'm not involved in a church, I can only imagine how it would feel). I wonder if this is a time where God has something in mind for you. A time of self-reflection? A time to grow closer to your kids? Something else unforseeable? Remember he's keeping you close and wouldn't allow anything that is bad for you in the long run. Right? Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteI do believe that God has something else for me to do. He has given me a vision of a book that I am supposed to write with my daughter and a couple of my teenage girl friends. I am excited about it.
ReplyDeleteI am also on a serious mission to lose weight, and I am excited about that.
I definitely have to spend time nurturing and teaching my children. They are so messed up in all of this.
You are right in saying that God has a purpose for the future that I just can't see right now.
Thanks for your support, Coco.
Sometimes when things are so thick, the path before us that we thought was God's seems to get blurry and a fog overcomes our whole environment so much so, that it's hard to see or imagine anything in our immediate future, let alone a long time down the road. But I firmly believe that God is holding your hand and he DOES have a purpose. Keep holding his. Believe, have a child-like faith... and that I think that will help carry you. You might find your own unique coping style, but this is how I ended up coping. God drew me close but it was such a journey and one I didn't expect or would ever want to take. He will take you to the most beautiful place ever. Keeping attainable goals, and DREAMS in your life is the best and most healthy thing you can do for yourself. I am so proud of you for taking your life by all ways and making the most of it. Living it the way you want to. It's your life and you deserve to enjoy it and do whatever it is you are called to and that brings you joy. When you focus on the things that God enables you to see, he fills in the rest. Sometimes it's best when the rest is "blurry" because what he is working out is just so magnificent. :) *hugs*
ReplyDeleteI am sorry to hear of what has happened. I am keeping you and your children in my prayers. May God continue to work His ways for you. I agree with the others that He has a plan for your life. He promises that He works all things for our good and His glory, even in very difficult time. This has been my comfort through the difficult times in my life. May God shower His love and mercies upon you and your children daily. Take care.
ReplyDeleteWith love and prayers,
Nancie
Jena,
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your beautiful encouragement. You have always been a blessing to me.
Love to you.
Nancie,
ReplyDeleteThank you for your prayers, love and encouragement. It is so nice to hear from you.
Blessings upon you today.